Old Wounds, New Growth - Chapter 26
Translator: Deyonna
The next day, I went home for a while, accompanied my parents to a meal, and after seeing them off to the airport, I headed straight to the vegetable market next to Li Chishu's house.
Before leaving, I repeatedly reminded Li Chishu not to sit in the doorway waiting for me like yesterday, in order to avoid catching a cold.
He was very obedient. When I arrived home, there was no one in the doorway, but the door was left open. As soon as I turned the corner of the stairs, Potato, with his keen sense of smell, detected my presence and ran back and forth, wagging his tail between inside and outside the door.
The sound of the dog barking didn't seem to attract Li Chishu to come out. I think he must be busy doing his homework in his room.
I went into the kitchen and started boiling water to steam rice. I marinated the chicken with cooking wine and waited for it to remove the fishy smell. Then I went to the room to check on how Li Chishu was doing.
In front of Li Chishu was a bubble sheet and a test paper. The bubble sheet is filled with multiple-choice next to the test paper.
I walked over and held up his head. "Eyes—"
Li Chishu straightened his posture, lifted his head slightly, and secretly glanced at me. When he realized that I was observing him with my arms crossed, he sheepishly smiled at me. "Got it."
I turned around and opened the door to the balcony. A gust of cold wind blew in, and I said, "Let some fresh air in, but if it gets too cold, grab a blanket to cover your legs."
He nodded. As I turned to take a step towards the kitchen, Li Chishu was still looking up at me like that. I chuckled and crossed my arms. "Li Chishu, is Shen Baoshan really that good-looking?"
Li Chishu finally shifted his gaze away, pursed his lips, as if trying to find a way to explain his momentary distraction. "En... What are we having for lunch?"
"We'll have taibai chicken[1], stir-fried chestnuts and shiitake mushrooms, and a side of greens. I saw some good crabs at the seafood market, so I bought a few big hairy crabs. After the meal, we can have some strawberries".
[1]Taibai Chicken (太白鸡) is a traditional Chinese dish made with poached or simmered chicken. It is known for its tender meat and savory taste. The dish is often accompanied by a dipping sauce made from soy sauce, sesame oil, and other seasonings. Taibai Chicken is a popular choice for banquets and special occasions in Chinese cuisine.
He responded with a simple "Oh" and then lowered his head to continue writing. I suspected that Li Chishu wasn't really paying attention, and he just wanted to talk to me.
The colorful tinted glass in the window reflected the sunlight from outside onto Li Chishu's nose. I glanced down at him as he worked on his homework for a while, then suddenly asked, "Li Chishu, would you like to set off fireworks tonight?"
Li Chishu's eyes lit up as he looked up, stretching his neck. "Fireworks?"
-
At 10 o'clock in the evening, Li Chishu came to the small park closest to his home after receiving my call.
He stood across from me, with a fireworks stall separating us. Pointing at the various fireworks displayed on a makeshift stand made of two long benches and a wooden board, he asked, "Which one... did you purchase?"
I crossed my arms and delightedly raised my chin at him.
Li Chishu: ?
I bought everything in the vendor's stall for Li Chishu.
Actually, I also brought some fireworks myself, but I was concerned that Li Chishu wouldn't enjoy it as much. After dinner and washing the dishes, I came to the park for a stroll. It's quite spacious here, and it's located near the outskirts of the city. The urban management and regulatory personnel seem to overlook the street stalls and fireworks display.
After taking a stroll around, I found a stall owner to negotiate with. I proposed that I would buy all the remaining fireworks, firecrackers, and sky lanterns for 1,000 yuan, and he could come to collect the stall tomorrow morning. The boss readily agreed upon hearing this, and we sealed the deal.
Now Li Chishu is pointing at the small stall and confirming with me repeatedly, "So, you mean you bought all of these?"
Before I could even respond, a couple walked up from the side. The man quickly inquired, "Boss, how much for the sparklers?"
"......"
I remained silent for a moment and told him, "Not for sale. They are for my personal use."
The man looked at me with a very strange expression and then went to the nearby stall.
Li Chishu watched the couple walk away, then turned his head to look at me with a hesitant expression of wanting to say something.
I coldly exposed him. "You want to sell?"
"......"
Li Chishu said tactfully, "I just thought... we definitely won't be able to set off all of them…"
Half an hour later, Li Chishu sat beside me, holding Potato in his arms, and was immersed in doing his homework. His head was buried in the corner of the wooden board that I had cleared for him.
While I had a look of nothing to live for on my face as I busily packed the pile of fireworks and sky lanterns that I had bought at a high price for customers. Then I collected money and gave change.
Li Chishu beside me sneezed.
"I told you to go home." I collected the latest payment and tossed it into the nearby paper box. Taking advantage of the moment when there were no customers, I sat down next to him in a bamboo chair. "It's cold outside."
Li Chishu shook his head. "I'll stay with you until we finish selling. Let's keep some of the remaining ones for ourselves."
I looked around and noticed a store across the street that specializes in home devices. I stood up and said, "Wait for me here for a moment."
Li Chishu held his pen and eagerly waited for me to come back.
I bought an electric heater from the store. It was the most popular type at this time, shaped like a birdcage, with two U-shaped electric poles inside. It was lightweight and easy to carry, making it easy to carry home with just one hand.
The neighboring shop lent me an electrical outlet, and I plugged in the heater. I placed it close to Li Chishu's feet. "Stay warm by the heater. That way, it won't be so cold."
Just as someone came to inquire about fireworks, I quickly got up to attend to them. After completing the transaction, I sat back down and caught a glimpse of Li Chishu placing the heater between his legs while I wasn't paying attention. His legs were positioned tightly together.
My eyebrows jumped, and I quickly patted his knee. "Move your legs away! You might get burned."
Li Chishu had been burned by this thing before. According to him, during his sophomore year in university, he went on a team-building trip with his roommate, who was the minister of the student union. The group rented a guesthouse for the event, but the owner, trying to save money, didn't open the air conditioning. There were only a few heaters of this style in the house.
Li Chishu had never used this thing during his university years. When he went to the guesthouse, it was his first time using a heater to keep warm. He was dressed in the least amount of clothing and felt extremely cold. He positioned his legs closer together for more warmth. However, before he even returned to the dormitory, he started feeling pain in his legs. When he rolled up his pants, he discovered three large blisters on his calf. It took a full two weeks for the blisters to slowly bleed and turn black before finally scabbing over. But the scars remained on his leg for many years.
When he told me about this incident, I could still see the three faint scars on the inside of his calf.
I was quite puzzled at that time. Li Chishu wasn't someone who enjoyed socializing. The team-building activities like this in the student union were usually split evenly among the participants. It would cost around 100 yuan per person for a night out.
"How did you end up joining the student union's team-building? Did your roommate ask you to accompany him?"
He shook his head and stared at the location of his scar in silence for a long time. "At that time, I thought... you would also go."
After all, I was a member of the student union. Li Chishu just wanted an opportunity to see me, that's all.
But I didn't go. Li Chishu waited from the beginning to the end of the team-building event, but I never showed up.
And I had long forgotten why I didn't go. In my boisterous and lively youth, I had turned down many people and many gatherings, so I had no way of knowing which wave Li Chishu had been engulfed in that I hadn't attended.
At this moment, he obediently moved his legs aside and looked at me with a quiet laugh.
"Why are you laughing?" I didn't know what he was laughing about, so I propped my arm on my knee, supported my chin, and tilted my head to look at him, laughing along. "I'm asking you, what are you laughing about?"
Li Chishu spoke, exhaling a puff of white breath. Many stalls around us had closed, and most people in the park had gone home. Li Chishu's voice, even in such a quiet environment, was not big and loud, always gentle, just like him. "When I was very young, before my mother and father went to work outside, they would also set up stalls like this during the winter. At that time, we didn't have heaters either. We would have a stove burning coal briquettes at home. If I got too close to the fire, my mother and father would tap my knee as you did and have me move my leg away a bit."
"Really?" I listened seriously, but my words were not in sync. "Then am I the mother or the father?"
Li Chishu was momentarily stunned by my question, then his tongue immediately got tied and said, "You, you are Shen Baoshan."
"I'm just teasing you." I flicked his nose as I curved my eyes cheerfully. "So, what were they selling? Did they sell fireworks too?"
Li Chishu shook his head. "They sold clothes. Fireworks were only popular during the month of the Lunar New Year. We couldn't afford a storefront, so we set up a stall in an open space near the park entrance, just like this. If it rained, we would set up a makeshift shed using those blue woven plastic sheets.
After he finished speaking, he added, "My mother was the one selling."
I asked, "And what about your father?"
"My father would go home and cook and then pick me up from kindergarten." Li Chishu smiled as he lowered his head. "My mother was really good at selling things. She had a very persuasive and assertive nature, and she never made a loss selling clothes. But my father wasn't good at it. My mother always said that my dad had a clumsy mouth, was too honest, and would be completely forced to suffer for a lifetime. When I was little, I would sit next to her stall and draw, and I would often hear her scolding my father, saying, 'One day, our son will end up just like you.' After saying that, she would worry about me and let out a deep sigh, saying, 'Being too honest isn't good either. What will Xiaobao do in the future?'"
He placed the pen he was holding on the paper and didn't look at me when he said this. Li Chishu recalled how his parents never looked at anyone, either staring into the void like he did when he was sick or now, bowing his head and looking at the exercise book in front of him. There was a slight hint of shyness in his smiles, as if his mother and father were right beside him and he smiled, speaking to them, "I'm sorry. I've brought up your story again and told it to others."
I reached out and pinched his face. "Yeah, what will our Xiaobao do in the future?"
Li Chishu's nose wrinkled as I pinched his face. I loosen my hand and knead his earlobe. "But luckily, there is Shen Baoshan in the future. My mother can rest assured."
"Pack up your homework," I said. "After we're done with the fireworks, let's go home."
-
Li Chishu picked the largest fireworks from the remaining ones—because it was expensive, few people were willing to buy it from this kind of stall.
I asked him to stay put, then I ran to the most open space in front to light the firework. After a sharp hissing sound, I covered my ears and ran back to sit next to Li Chishu.
Li Chishu tilted his head back, opened his mouth slightly, and covered his ears. With a soft voice, he quietly exclaimed, "Wow."
I reclined on the bamboo chair, using my hands as a pillow behind my head. I looked at the back of Li Chishu's head and suddenly called out to him, "Li Chishu."
Li Chishu turned around and pulled his hands. "What's wrong?"
"Have you ever thought about what our future home should be like?"
"Home?" Li Chishu repeated slowly, "...our home?"
"Yes." I said matter-of-factly, "If we're always together, there will come a day when we have our own home. I can't keep living at my parents' house, and neither can you. We need to move out and have a new home."
Unexpectedly, Li Chishu didn't answer my question. He avoided my gaze, slowly turned back around, looked at the fireworks, and then shifted his gaze to his own feet.
I waited in silence for a while, facing Li Chishu's back, before I heard him whisper softly, "But Shen Baoshan, can anyone truly stay together forever? And... it's still you and me."
His evasion and silence reminded me of the 30-year-old Li Chishu. Back then, Li Chishu would also smile as he listened to me plan our future days, the countries and cities we would travel to when we grew old, and the layout of our new home. Then he would tell me, "Shen Baoshan, no one stays together forever."
But during that time, Li Chishu was even colder and more resolute than he was now. He didn't question me with a doubtful tone, nor did he leave any room for argument. He simply calmly rejected the proposition, much like stating the undeniable truth of gravitational force—Shen Baoshan. We will not be together forever.
Li Chishu, why have you always been so stubborn from childhood to adulthood?
I’m a bit angry.
Correcting my wife's mistakes starts from a young age.
Ordinary people might think that this is fate—But, there's no way. I am Shen Baoshan.
After Li Chishu finished speaking, I scooted my chair forward and rested my knees against his. I told him, word by word. "Li Chishu, no two people are bound together constantly. What you said is true. There will be moments in life when we are alone. But you have to believe that from now on and in the future, until the day you take your last look at this world, Shen Baoshan will always be by your side. Perhaps one day in the future, you and I will face separation, but it won't be for long."
I pointed to the fireworks that continued to crackle and burst into the sky. "Just like fireworks, no matter how high they soar, they will eventually descend to the ground. And as for Xiaobao, no matter how far away he is from Shen Baoshan, he will eventually come back home."
He curled his fingertips slightly, and I gently took hold of his hand, cradling it in the hollow of my palm. "Li Chishu, me being by your side is not just to make you like me."
Finally, these words seemed to touch him, and he lifted his lowered eyes to search for my expression.
"I said I want to give you a lot of love, and I wasn't joking. Love isn't just about happiness, it encompasses so much more, including facing life's separations and farewells with composure. I haven't fully mastered it myself, so I hope to accompany you in loving this world together—of course," I paused, "it would be even better if you could also love Shen Baoshan along the way."
Li Chishu was amused and laughed.
I laughed along with him, and as I laughed, I gently patted the back of his hand. With a relaxed mood, I leaned back in my chair and watched as the last bit of fireworks descended from the sky.
Everything returned to silence, and my voice became as gentle as Li Chishu's when he spoke—soft and slow. "I want to bring you happiness, but more importantly, I want to give you the confidence to overcome all the challenges in your life. There will be times when you won't be by my side. You will encounter winds and rains on your own. But I hope that when you encounter them, you will think of Shen Baoshan, think of the days we have spent together, and find strength not to be easily knocked down. With every hurdle you pass, every darkness you encounter, you can step forward with the shadow of Shen Baoshan, and with every rain and every gust of wind, I will be eagerly waiting to meet you."
"So, Li Chishu." I breathed out. "Even if you're alone, you also need to remember to eat well, sleep well, and think of Shen Baoshan before you go to bed every night. The more you think about Shen Baoshan, the closer you will get to him."
January 30th, Sunny
Today I couldn't resist and went out to have a bowl of beef noodle soup.
The beef noodle soup was so delicious, much more delicious than what I've cooked.
But it was a bit expensive, seven yuan per bowl, and now that I think about it, I feel a little regretful.
January 30th, Sunny
Will Shen Baoshan and I really have a home in the future? Shen Baoshan wanted to have a home with me.
It seems like Shen Baoshan really wanted to give me a lot of things.
Will he be upset by the way I spoke today? Should I apologize? But it seems like apologizing won't help.
Instead of apologizing, maybe I should trust him more.
Home... What will Shen Baoshan and my home look like?
There will be Potato.
Where will it be? Will it still be in this city? What does Shen Baoshan like to have in the house? How about I ask him later?
But is it too early to ask now?
I'll ask later.
-
Translator's Corner: So, originally, I was supposed to divide this chapter into two parts. However, I have changed my mind because this chapter is so lovely that I want all of you to read it in its entirety so I'm late for the scheduled update again.
Comments
Post a Comment